Day Dreaming

In the last weekend of January I framed my first finished painting of 2025. It’s called “Day Dreaming”.

The story behind this piece is that this lovely lady finds herself in the midst of turmoil and drama. But she’s not completely present in the moment. She’s also in another and better world and I like to think that she brings some of that better world back into ours to make things a little better.

Day Dreaming

The Dreamers can always can see things better than they are. I love how the Dreamers don’t immediately chop up every challenge into to do lists and get to work. No… They take a step back and let their minds wander… They seemed to be able to ignore the ticking clock completely.

I also noticed the Dreamers often come up with more original and less obvious solutions to problems, but often way more effectively.

Wouldn’t many of us love to be able to deliberately let go of the “here and now” for a few days to make space for new perspectives, new ideas and creativity. To step out of the comfort zone and really step into the unknown where the improbable is possible.

For me, this is so hard to do when so many responsibilities weigh on my shoulders. Reality is very sticky and persistent. I always need some form of control. Like a little box I can put around any situation and let the chaos free. But inside the box. Contained chaos… To some this may seem an illusion, but still… I always seem to be able to steer things into a better direction. This attitude towards life kept me out of a lot of trouble and saved me from many heartaches. Of course this comes at a price; I stand guard pretty most of the time and I see what needs to be done. Like the dishes, cleaning up clutter, do chores, getting work done…

But I’m able to let go when I’m painting. There’s just creativity and peace of mind. There is no chaos, or sense of time. There’s just colours and brush strokes. There’s just the experiment of experimenting. It’s free and simple. And to me, it’s bliss.

I guess that’s why I love painting so much; I become the Dreamer. But honestly, after the painting is done, I return to that hardcore to-do-mode. I don’t know if that’s normal or not. Some have told me I worry too much and that I’m just in the wrong line of work and I should ‘ve been a professional artist. But I can’t see how that would work.

Like many of us, I have responsibilities that have to be met. And I can’t just live on Dreamer energy when I’m responsible for others, like kids. Their fate is so a large extent tied to mine. The contained chaos I talked about keeps our feet firm in the ground while life’s fun and challenging chaos can whirl at its will. So I don’t think I’m shutting life out, but I’m not totally surrendered to life’s circumstances either.

Life’s complicated and at times I do feel a bit lost. Maybe I’m not fulfilling my purpose? It was never my life’s goal to work at an office or to be in the line of work I’m in now. Life just threw a couple of nasty curveballs, I had to pay the bills and this was the most reliable way to make ends meet. Life was just well, life… And many, many other people had to make the same choices too… So does that mean they aren’t fulfilling their purpose too? I surely don’t think their lives are less valuable, but there is a gap. Just like I have a gap.

My solution for now is contained chaos and something I describe is “creating in the cracks”. By this I mean where and when ever there is a “crack” like something to repair, something to plan, a bit of time to put to good use, a problem to solve, I try approach it with as much Dreamer’s energy as possible and then just get to work. Like those street artists that literally make art from the cracks (check out Cynthia Decker’s Between the cracks or Sluggo on the Street) or just on the get go.

Mostly I don’t have a plan, just an intention and I keep going to fail forward. I guess looking back, that was how this piece was created. A little like those cool street artists…, though it came out nothing like their style.

Funny how I got all of that from creating a painting.

See you next time!